Liam Holyoak

This is where I write things.

Month: August 2017


It’s dark. Early morning still. I’ve already done a lot this morning but the urge to get in bed is calling me. I don’t ‘technically’ need to get ready for work for another hour. So what the hell, I think. My bed is cozier in the morning. It’s colder. I pull my covers up to my neck, leave the door open so the living room light is seeping in. It’s not night time darkness. It’s morning. It’s still. I love this time of day. I check my phone, not really looking for anything. A distraction maybe. I swipe through my YouTube feed. I come across a sad song. I close my eyes and listen. My eyes well up, I may feel sad if I wasn’t surrounded by so much love. I’m laying on my side. Lucian is curled behind my knees, as close as he can get. Luna(my brothers kitten) is lying on top of me, purring like a motor. I’m overwhelmed with gratitude. I feel so lucky. This life is full of so many wonders. I love being able to find them in the simplest of things.

Love/Hate Relationship

I hate running. I love it too. But I suck at it, so the emotion of hating it seems to shine through a little more. When I started strength training everything I read said to give it two months. Force yourself to get in the gym for two months, and after that you’ll start seeing progress. When you start seeing progress it’s something you grow to love. I’ve only been doing it for four months, but every lifting day I look forward to it. But running? No one ever tells you that. No one says it’s going to absolutely suck, for probably longer than two months. It’s probably going to suck for six months. Maybe more than that, but if you want to be a runner you just have to keep going. So that’s what I tell myself. When I am running, gasping for air, frustrated that Lucian won’t run right next me. I have to tell myself to keep going. It doesn’t always work. If I’m being honest I’ve missed my last couple running days. But I’m getting up, I’m trying again. I know it’s going to suck. But if I’m going to be a runner. I must run.

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